all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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