so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
