That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
