Don't you send me to vm
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
