I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
