Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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