I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
