I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
