I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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