You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize