dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
