margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Are my feet made of real feet?
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
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