It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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