Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
