Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
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