How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
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