How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
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