What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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