This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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