I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Randomize
