So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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