so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse