Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Randomize
