i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
