He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
