am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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