So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
