I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
