You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
