okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
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The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
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He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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