how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
