i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Operation Purity has been aborted
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
