Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
soo... how was my night?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
