So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
