with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
