dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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