after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I just forgot I was standing up.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
So. Much. Porn.
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