redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
i think im in europe. pls send help
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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