But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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