super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
