I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
