What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
