just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize