I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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