tequila makes me forget i have legs
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
