Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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