Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
