wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life