I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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