THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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