But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
