i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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